Slelf Love Part One
The Art of Self Love
I call it the art of self-love as opposed to simply self-love because like art loving yourself is unique and can be as by the book or creative as you like. It takes many forms and just like art it takes a lot of practice to become proficient at.
As I mentioned, for everyone it’s pretty unique depending on your current reality and unique spirit. Many people have been mislead into believing that self-love is egotistic or selfish, even as I am writing this my rude laptop is defining it as this. But its not at all, how on earth are we meant to fulfill our needs and create our dreams without self-love? How can we fully step into our purpose without gentle love and care along the way? In order for things around us to grow and thrive we offer them our love and care, so what makes ourselves any different. So what is it? I can say that its not just simply a lush bath bomb here and there or a large glass of red wine after a long day. Self-love to me is treating myself on all levels physical, spiritual and mental with the same love and care I treat my nearest and dearest with (sometimes a little more.) And this is where our uniqueness comes into play because we all love differently some may show it more physically, some verbally, others spiritually or even a fun mixture of all of the above. But most of all we need to treat ourselves with that same love, so many of us are out there with the disease to please at the expense of ourselves.
Now that we have a very brief definition of self love, how do we implement it into our daily practices? For me this is the most difficult, especially with my inner dialogue. More and more I am noticing around me and within me, how we tear ourselves down, block our desires and compare ourselves to others who are on completely different journeys. We have bred a society that spews unrealistic standards, teaches us that without certain criteria we are a failure and that happiness is a destination somewhere in your distant future. All of which roots itself in our subconscious minds and plants seeds of doubt and fear, leading to a large group of people drowning in their own destructive thoughts.
All of this can be difficult to uproot and make changes to, but it is possible, trust me just one step at a time. The best place to make a start is inside because everything in our lives is a reflection of what is on the inside. Start to acknowledge those limiting beliefs and destructive thoughts. Examples from my own busy mind are; “every time I try, I end up failing” , “what I have to offer the world isn’t good enough” and “why does everything I get have to take a fight?” All of these thoughts have been placed there at some point by me in some capacity and in the same way I placed them there I can remove them and replace them with much more real and loving thoughts. A great question to ask these limiting beliefs is by asking yourself “says who?” “show me how this is 100% fact forever” I can pretty much guarantee that you will quickly come to realize that maybe at some point in your journey these statements had some meaning however that was then and this is now. You are growing and changing and moving forward every single day and absolutely nothing in this universe is impossible.
My favorite example to back up the statement of nothing is impossible, and I am sure you may have heard it before is the story of Rodger bannister and the 4 minute mile. Back in 1954 no one had run the 4 minute mile. Everyone claimed it was humanly impossible for our bodies to run a mile in 4 minutes. Rodger bannister ignored the general belief and completed the 4 minute mile in 1954 setting a new world record. Now the 4 minute mile is the standard for professional middle distance runners and the record has since been broken and is now 3:43.13. No matter the current belief system with the right amount of inner strength and belief we are capable of things our minds cannot yet even fathom.
Back to the inner monologue. Now that you have called your chatty mind out on its bullshit, you can begin to replace those thoughts with ones of self-love. From my previous example I could swap “every time I try, I end up failing.” With “with the right amount of knowledge, self-belief and practice I can achieve anything I want.” This can all sound simple in theory but putting it into practice takes time. Do not expect over night miracles and do not be hard on yourself when the negative inner monologue takes over. Remember its self-love and you need to be gentle with yourself, take a few deep breaths and try again all is not lost.
This is part one of self-love and I plan to have the second part ready to post soon. In the meantime, I wish you love and abundance in your journey of self-love, may it bring you the strength so begin to see just how powerful you are with the right tools. As always, my writing is centered around what has helped me the most along my journey of spiritual and life discovery, we are all unique so take what resonates and leave what doesn’t. And remember you are worthy of everything your heart and spirit desire; it is your cosmic destiny to be here right now in this moment. Paint the universe with your beautiful soul, you can do it I believe in you.
Love Maddison x